Whimsy & Fuckery
Whimsy & Fuckery
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© accioloki

foodffs:

Polenta Skillet Eggs with Chorizo

Really nice recipes. Every hour.

trotskay:

what if Lucy Liu played Captain America

honhonbaguetterivaille:

linestorm:

200 words that describe light

u do not understand my gratitude

24/4/14

ratpoet replied to your post “imperialarchon replied to your post:”#’I gotta kill a man with my bare…”

that would be bestiality

………………………………………..

dontkillbirds:

Doctor Who is no longer my fave TV show and you have no idea how sad that makes me

broblerones:

"animated tv shows for adults can’t really be funny unless they’re offensive, it’s called satire!"
image

duncan: hey wanna get outta this shitty monastery and be a grey warden
alistair: *massive inhale*
duncan: the fuck--
alistair: *singing* fOR THE FIRST TIME IN FERELDEN, IM GETTING WHAT IM DREAMING OF! FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FERELDEN~ IVE BEEN NOTICED BY SOMEONE~! and I know it's totally crazy, to dream that I'd ESCAAAAAPE~~!
duncan: maker fucking preserve me
24/4/14

YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THE HORSE BUT YOU DON’T LET YOURSELF KILL IT?

yyyy….eeEESS

slowlyandthen:

heads up for anyone who is a complete dumbass like myself: do not drink copious amounts of alcohol and then stay up really late and sober up before you go to bed because the results are disastrous

DRINkKKKK WATERRRR and thEN SLEEP FRIEND
HUGS YOU

drarna:

before blaming others, think: whats the 1 constant in all your failed relationships? its that cursed egyptian amulet why do u even have that

huntingjaeger:

nudityandnerdery:

2percentmelk:

(Source: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/21xynj/this_is_daniel_handler_aka_lemony_snicket_trapped/)

That is fantastic life advice.

Lemony Snicket doesn’t give a damn fuck

24/4/14

maniclaughter:

raggediandi:

ghostgif:

when you yell “puppy!” at a lil doge and they get happy and wag their lil tail like “yess!! i am a puppy!! a baby dog!!! thank you!!!!!!”

When you yell “puppy!!!!” At an old doge and they wag their tail and get all happy like “yes I am still a little doge thank you for noticing! !”

jaclcfrost:

people legitimately wanting to be around me and like talk to me and be my friend makes me feel a weird mixture of flattery and confusion and moderate concern like. are you sure you want to do this. are you positive. are you aware of how much of an annoying loser i am. is this being filmed. and then when someone laughs at what i say it’s. satisfying but really scary. like are you okay. are you sure

Other Smith girls: super cute, great personalities, intelligent, relatively stressed out, overall just terrific
Me: green grass, old and ornery, fucking bikes chained to me for 6 months

slowlyandthen:

My friends were talking about the “because of reasons” comic, and my two asexual friends were really confused about why a slippery butt would be a good thing
And the one was like, “maybe so they can slide around on floors???”
And the three of us non-asexual friends just looked at each other, daring each other to tell them the truth
Their expressions when one friend finally said, “I think the slipperiness extends to not the outside of the butt” was HILARIOUS